Oh Star, No Other Love Compares To Mine
by Zakhariahz
Summary: Sequel to Stay While I Play The Piano In The Dark For You. She’s done it;she’s left him and she’s finally trying to move on with her life but Edward refuses to let go. He chases and she runs. He just won’t give up. How will this one play out? Please R&R!
1. Chapter 1

OH STAR, NO OTHER LOVE COMPARES TO MINE

THE SEQUEL TO STAY WHILE I PLAY THE PIANO IN THE DARK FOR YOU.

AUTHOR: **Zakhariahz**

GENRE: **Romance/Angst**

CHARACTERS: **Edward/Bella**

RATED: **M**

SUMMARY: **She's done it; she's left him and she's finally trying to move on with her life but Edward refuses to let go. He chases and she runs. He just won't give up. How will this one play out?**

CHAPTER ONE: 'THE AFTER'

**Edward Masen**

**I sighed when I could no longer hear my car. With slow, steady hands, I closed the wooden lid over the ivory keys, looking at my fingers where they lay. She had so much faith in my fingers, so much faith in me.**

"**Oh, Bells, what have I done to you?" **_**'Love me'**_**, she'd always say and I'd believe her because I loved her smile and the way her face lit up like Christmas morning. I didn't feel sorry for myself, strangely enough, and my eyes were still bone dry and on fire. Now as I got up from the cushioned bench and walked over to a china cabinet that was packed, instead, with photoframes of our years together, I wondered how Bella had ended up with me, wondered why she had chosen me over Charlie and more importantly, why she had bothered to stay with me this long. My eyes raked warily over the photos and I, who had faultless memory, recalled every detail of each frozen escapade, thinking that maybe I should've smiled like I meant it – like I wanted to be there with her. With furrowed brows, my eyes breezed over the frames in search of one in particular.**

"**Ah, found it!" My smile was wide and childishly triumphant. In this photo, there was only a view of my head in her lap but it was by far my fondest memory of us. One of my eyes were closed, the eyebrow over the other half-opened one cocked high up on my forehead and my teeth were flashed in a hearty laugh. My hair shone in the sunlight, looking even brighter against her pale, bare legs. It had been the day she had convinced me to comb out my hair and it was the day I had convinced her to wear shorts. It was also the day we had had our first, proper date. We had been young and the word had been at our feet but she had been sixteen and I had been sweet for her. Who cared about the world?**

_**Flashback**_

"_**Comb my hair?" I asked the mirror in disbelief, grimacing slightly at my damp waves, "I mean, I haven't touched my hair with a comb since I was a little kid." The phone rang besides my bed then.**_

_**Grumbling slightly, I answered, "Masen."**_

"_**Swan?"**_

"_**Excuse me?"**_

"_**You said your last name, so I said mine as well," she answered innocently, her voice on the brink of laughter. **__'Jump,' __**I thought, **__ 'Jump. Let me hear that sweet laugh.'_

"_**Oh!" I laughed, shaking my head and rolling my eyes even though she couldn't see. "There better had be a purpose to this call miss," I teased, "I was just about to molest my hair with the instrument of said molestation that you bought for me."**_

"_**You'll look less scruffy and handsome," she said pointedly.**_

"_**I thought you liked me scruffy," I whispered à **__**voix**__** bass into the receiver. There was a silence which could only mean she was blushing. "I'm going to go get ready, sweet lips, don't forget those shorts."**_

"_**You haven't tasted my lips yet, Edward," she countered sexily. I rolled my head to kill a moan.**_

"_**Tonight, Bella, tonight."**_

"_**Promise?" **__'Sixteen, sixteen, sixteen,' __**I reminded myself,**__ 'Not on the first date.'_

"_**Promise." **__'Idiot.'_

"_**Bye, Edward." She hung up before I could respond in anyway. Frowning at the receiver, I put it back down on the cradle and picked up the comb.**_

_**Surprisingly it wasn't too bad**_

_**She was waiting in front of her house, standing, bouncing on the balls of her feet. She looked… it just knocked the wind out of me. I'd seen her in that white cotton – peasant? – blouse before as well as those basket-heeled, white sandals but her brand new, denim short-shorts made her look like a woman; not quite my twenty-six summers but definitely not sixteen, even though her long, brown curls hung in two messy plaits. Bella bounded over to the car, flinging open the door before I had the chance to get out to do it for her.**_

"_**Hey, Edward," she said cheerily, beaming as she fastened her seatbelt.**_

"_**Hey, yourself, kid." I grinned easily at her, thinking in some dominant niche in my mind, **__'This would be easy.'_

**The frame fell from my trembling fingers and smashes upon hitting the floor, flying in all directions. Clumsily, I fell to the floor and unearthed the picture from the bed of broken glass and plastic, my hands, inevitably, cut on the shards. I went back to the piano, propping the photo on the keys, putting some blood on them in the process.**

_**Flashback**_

"_**The carnival!" Bella squealed in delight, "You've brought me to the carnival!"**_

_**I laughed quietly. "Yes, I thought you'd like it and I guess I was right."**_

"_**Oh my God! Edward, I love you!" She threw herself at me, half-choking me in her excitement.**_

_**I ruffled her pretty hair, jokingly, I said, "Not yet.", and she blushed profusely for a moment before grabbing my arm to haul me off to the ticket booth. There were these special hand-bands that allowed you to go on all of the rides as many times as you liked at forty dollars apiece, so I purchased those, laughing at her expression as I tied it around her thin wrist.**_

"_**Let's go!" Bella hauled me through every ride. Twice. She had so much energy, all nicely wrapped, until she let it out.**_

"_**Okay! Enough!" I cried, plopping my ass down unceremoniously on the picnic bench. With a small pout, she sat next to me, dropping her little, drawstring purse behind me on the table. Smoothly, I lay my head in her lap and propped my legs up on the bit of bench left. Bella stroked my hair absentmindedly before saying, "Your hair looks nicer like this."**_

"_**Sure sure." My eyes closed, my breathing evening out. I heard rummaging.**_

"_**You're cute for an old dude." I cocked and eyebrow, opening an eye slightly to look at her, laughing loudly. The flash of a Polaroid camera blinded me momentarily.**_

"_**Oh, Star…"**_** I startled, turning sharply and landing brutally on the floor. Pain pulsed at my knees and the heel of my hand. My head snapped around to see the radio playing one of her Paramore CDs. I got up. I had landed oddly on my left knee so with each step, I winced. Wince, wince, wince…my knee, my knee, my knee; it hurt… Wince, wince, wince…me, me, me; I hurt…**

"_**I won't let you fall away from me."**_** I froze with my hand outstretched. **_**"You will never fade."**_

**My hand dropped like deadweight. "Sorry, Bella, but you aren't getting away from me that easily."**

**Searing pain or no, I ran to that phone like my life depended on the sucker.**

**Isabella Swan**

**I had cried.**

**It had been all that I had done since I had left that house. I had cried when I had called my brother, Jake, from Edward's phone – stupid-ass man still had never learnt the concept of 'mobile phone'. I had cried when I had pulled up in front of Jake's house. I had cried myself to sleep in Jake's long, skinny arms. The tears just hadn't stopped coming; my storm refused to let up and the turbulence it had caused in my heart – my soul – had me torn up. 'Completely blenderized' Jake called it.**

**Now, as I emptied out his glove box – the one place he kept anything in this car – to dump his shit, I bawled like a baby and screamed-bloody-murder. I clung to the little thing and missed him with an insurmountably amount of longing.**

_**Flashback**_

_**I wanted to cry when he pulled up in front of my house around midnight. "I had a great time," I sighed instead.**_

"_**Why are you sounding like that, little girl?" he asked, pleasantly surprised, his pale, angular face bright in the car's interior. "Don't look so tragic. It was our first but it isn't our last. I would very much like to see you again."**_

_**Like the little kid I was, I squealed and launched myself over the gear stick and into his lap. "Really?"**_

"_**Yes, really." He rubbed his nose to mine in a sweet, Eskimo kiss. "I had a lot of fun tonight." I'd never seen eyes so green before. It was like they were too green to be real. They were bright and beautiful and laughed jovially at me. Then they grew dark and heated, his voice dropping. "I'm going to kiss you now, Bella. Let's see just how sweet those red-cherry lips are."**_

"_**I've never been kissed," I confessed, dropping my gaze to his neck, shivers still making me squirm. Edward coaxed my face back up to his, rubbing my leg tenderly with his free hand. He kissed me chastely.**_

"_**Let me kiss you the way I've been aching to, please." His strong voice was earnest and breathy, his lips hovering in anticipation at the corner of my mouth.**_

"_**Kiss me, Edward. Kiss me and stop aching." Edward's lips were a soft pressure that pushed mine apart to dance with his, and then his slick tongue slid past my teeth to meet mine. He kissed me with tongue and teeth, fight and fire, pulling on my swelling lips with his teeth, pulling my legs to have me closer in the small space. My elbow connected with the door and I pulled away from him, reflexively. Edward growled and pulled me back, cupping my face roughly with one hand and wrapping the other around me, squeezing the swell of my hip. His fire dimmed and his kisses became gentle before he pulled away I entirety.**_

_**I was a child who was naïve and did not know but he was a man who knew everything and I wanted him to teach me. In my innocence, I pulled out the white satin ribbon that held my left plait and tucked it into the breast pocket of his jacket. He smiled gently, taking my face between his long hands. My eyes closed contentedly as my face lay cradles in the warmth of his palms. My lips flattened for a small while under his.**_

**I could barely believe that I held the ribbon as well as the fact that he kept it. With that self-same ribbon, I pulled back my hair and composed myself. What I had given away in innocence and infatuation, I took back in negativity but despite, everything, at the back of my mind I hoped I could give it back to him.**

"**Bella?" Jake had come out of the house, half-dressed and shaking. Poor kid looked scared out of his wits. I felt ashamed of myself and it was, admittedly, a comforting chance form chasm-like depression.**

"**I love him," I sniffed, turning away from him. Maybe I hoped it was enough for another time or maybe I just needed an excuse for being so stupid.**

"**I know," Jake sighed, "and I love you, sis." Oh, Jake, so beautifully naïve and only eighteen, what I would've given to take the fear out of your voice.**

"**I know, Jake, just give me some time to make it enough." **_**'Give me time to believe it's enough.'**_


	2. Chapter 2

**AN:- okay, I just need to make something clear before I proceed. Jake is not Jacob Black. He's Jacob Swan, a completely different character from the Jacob Black we all know and love. So with that said, here's chapter two. Please review it. I really believe I should had some incentive to continue. =)**

SUMMARY: She's done it; she's left him and she's finally trying to move on with her life but Edward refuses to let go. He chases and she runs. He just won't give up. How will this one play out?

**CHAPTER TWO: 'SYATEMATICALLY'**

Edward Masen

"What the fuck do you mean you can't track it?" I growled into the cordless, my mind desperately willing Harold Jr. to say what I needed to hear.

"I can't get a lock on it, Masen. I mean, it registered, it's functioning but I's constantly blipping from one location to the next." This mechanic was worthless.

"You, fucktard, did you consider that maybe she was moving?" I was at my wits end, completely frayed.

"Not possible, boss man. It just disappears from one location and pops up at a next but it's a pattern." My ears perked up in anticipation. "It blips n a circuit of ten different locations all scattered around the place and none of them are really related in any characteristic way." Okay, maybe Harold Jr. wasn't completely useless after all. "This chick must really be something, Eddie boy," Harold mused knowingly.

"It's Bella," I whispered ashamedly.

"You let her get away from you?" he sounded disbelieving. "Has one of your whores fucked you so hard that your brain fell out of your ass?"

"Shut the fuck up, mofo."

"Grab a pen and paper." I scrambled for a bit, searching. The first pen didn't work. "Okay," I prompted. "First location it blipped at was Bookworm Inc. then a residential area in East Seattle, a coffee shop close to Forks High, Forks High, a community college in Seattle, it completely blipped out La Plush, her dad's house, the Weber family place, good doc Cullen's place and her brother's house in Port Angeles."

"Thanks," I said with as much sincerity as I could have. "By the way, what are the possible reasons for it going haywire?"

"Well," he droned, "these things were highly experimental. Rosalie was telling Jasper the other day that she was shocked they held out for so long. Wait, maybe you should talk to one of my crack-ass, teenage prodigy mechanics." I heard him call for them, then the twins fighting over the phone, punctuating thumps with yelps, drawing out exasperated groans from me.

"Hey, Edward!" they piped up from the other end of the line.

"Lemme guess, speaker phone?" These kids were like my family but they were annoyingly childish for sixteen year old geniuses.

"Yup!" Did anything ever kill their mood?

"Okay munchkins." They interrupted me with a "Hey!" "What's the story with my tracking device?"

"Have you been experiencing any difficulties?"

This was getting irritating. "Well, I haven't had to track down my fucking car before this," I hissed, bringing up my free hand to pinch the bridge of my nose.

"We meant any funny noises. Have you experienced any trouble starting the car or has it been cutting off?" Nope, they still haven't deflated.

"No, everything was fine with my car," My hand rose higher to run through my hair, knots catching between my fingers, halting my movements for the time it took for me to burst through them. My brows furrowed deeply and I heard the munchkins gasp.

"Sabotage!" they yelled in indignance.

I, however, began to laugh. Shaking my head, I appreciated how thorough she had been and said, "She disconnected the system. God, I love that woman even more!"

"We don't!" Dear God, those two were adorable when they pouted.

_Flashback_

"_We want to meet her!" they cried in unison._

"_For her to go running for the hills? No thank you." I picked up the two junior blonds, supporting each on my hips._

"_We won't do nothing!" Jasper piped up, squashing my face between his pudgy hands._

"_Anything," I corrected through forcefully puckered lips._

_Rosalie kissed me, giggling to the gags of her brother, then said, " We wanna meet her."_

_In all honesty, the twins would love Bella as she would love them. The three of them were almost the same really; adorable, easy to be around and excessively lovable. Then there was the fact that when they smiled at me, they were undeniable. I thought about Bella's smile for a moment, the corners of my, now, freed mouth turning up involuntarily and it was a beautiful moment for she was beautiful and being with her was a beautiful thing through any looking glass. If love was the Sun, he was my moon to reflect it unto me. I did not doubt that she loved me, even though it had only been a year, but I did not love her. Maybe a cracked pocket mirror would fool her for now._

"_**Edward…"**__ Bella was calling me with that smile._

"_**Edward…"**_

"_**Edward…"**_

"_Edward!" SMACK._

"_Ouch! What the –" I stopped. The twins giggled profusely at me._

"_Eddie, you made a goofy face!" Jazz guffawed into his little hands. Tears were budding at the corners of his eyes from holding back his laughter. He was so adorable with the splotches of pink across his face. Poor kid… it was a damn shame their mother didn't see that before she dropped them off at the shelter._

"_We're meeting her," Rosalie said firmly, sharply turning her head away from me and turning her nose up, her lovely, flaxen curls falling like delicate golden ribbons to her waist. How could anyone give up such beautiful children?_

"_Of course, ma'am!" I hollered playfully, Harold Sr.'s wife coming into their shabby living room to check up on us. She smiled at the natural camaraderie I shared with the munchkins._

"_I swear, Edward, sometimes they want to be your kids instead!" she exclaimed, sweetly joking as the twins 'fixed my hair'._

_I laughed loudly. "I swear, I'll eat these munchkins if they don't stop messing with my hair. Ouch!" One of them had just burst a rather large knot in my hair._

"_So what time is she coming over?" the older woman asked me consciously._

_I sighed in mock resignation. "I'll bring her by around eight, lemme just call her and ask her if she's free for tonight."_

"_You know where the phone is," she said, beaming and walking out of the room._

_No one met my family; ever. I never brought home any women to meet Harold Sr. and his wife, Gina, or my munchkins. None of those women lasted long enough or mattered enough, for that matter, for me to bring them home. Did this mean that Bella mattered? Well, I did like her a lot and that was saying something since we hadn't had sex yet. Tentatively, not to mention with great difficulty due to the two monkeys I had attached to me, I dialed her number and waited for her to pick up._

"_The phone rang exactly five and a half times. "Hello?" came the gruff voice of Chief Swan who, honesty, thought I was a psychotic pedophile._

"_Hello, good day, Chief Swan. May I speak with Bella, please." I was sure to speak as monotonously polite as was possible and not be over friendly._

"_Hang on," he growled in a voice that made my balls shrink._

"_Ok." Jasper was, now, cheerily sucking on a lock of my hair and pulling another, Rosalie smacking him over my head and missing, each smack landing on the crown of my head._

_I screamed, "Cut it out, munchkins!" the precise moment Bella squealed, "Hey, Edward!"_

"_Huh?" we said in unison as I dislodged the kids from my person._

"_No, you first," we said together once more._

"_It's okay." Together again. We laughed for a while, not wanting to be the first to break it._

_Something solid connected with my shin and I yelped loudly, interrupting our laughter. Gina pinched my shoulder angrily. "Hurry up and ask her," she whispered furiously. Wait, Gina had kicked me??? Said woman stood, looking up at me with her hands on her hips._

"_What was that?" Bella asked curiously._

"_I'm at my uncle's house and his wife just kicked my shins. They and their kids wanna meet you. They've been bugging me." Gins poked my chest and I made a prominent grimace of pain. Bella giggled like a little school girl and it took me a moment to remember that she was. "So that's why I called. I wanted to find out if you wanted to come around their place at eight this evening."_

_Bella was still giggling at me when she answered. "After all the trouble you've probably gone through, it'd be awful of me to say no. what time do I get ready for?"_

"_Seven." Gina made a move to poke me again but luckily, I turned so she hit my arm instead. I stuck out my tongue at her._

"_Okay. Byebye, Edward."_

"_See you later, sweetheart." Once the receiver was securely nestled on the cradle, I yelped out. "Gina, are you freaking insane?!"_

"_Those two little monkeys were attempting to thrash my kitchen while you were laughing away like an idiot with your girlfriend. I was desperate." She looked so comically exasperated that I couldn't help but burst into a fit of hysterical laughter._

_I felt a bit – euphemistic for a whole frigging lot – idiotic in the clothes Gina had forced me into. Te jeans were a little stiff around my knees and the 'V' at the neck of the jersey dipped a bit too low for my preference. Fidgeting with the jeans, I picked my way up the front yard of the Swan's residence. Politely, I knocked on the door. The white, panel door swung inward and I was attacked by a flash of bright green._

"_Hi, Edward!" she giggled, wrapping her arms and legs about my body as I righted myself._

"_Hi there, sugar lips," I gasped, thoroughly winded. She giggled again. I couldn't help what I did next. With one long stride, I had her pressed up against the rough wall by the door, devouring that smile with hungry, wanton kisses._

'_**Seventeen, seventeen, seventeen…'**__ "Seventeen," I murmured into her mouth, pushing those thoughts away with harder thrusts of my tongue._

'_**Innocent, innocent, innocent…' **__"Innocent," I moaned when she bit my tongue, groping everything in my reach until I had a firm grip on her ass, squeezing to milk the venom of righteousness form me._

'_**Forbidden, forbidden, forbidden…' **__"Mine," I snarled, grinding into her defiantly. Bella whimpered._

_Everything sort of snapped right there and I caught myself, feeling spent. My lips fell away from her mouth unto her shoulder. For a few moments, I listened to her labored breathing and racing heart, feeling her slender fingers smoothening my hair and touching my neck. If she felt my erection between us, she didn't egg me on, adamant to continue what I had stopped._

"_Edward?" My eyes fluttered shut at the softness of her voice. __**'Say more, please.' **_

"_Mmhm?"_

"_Can I come down?" I began shaking my head, wetness forming at my eyes. "You're shaking." Bella sounded panicked. My parents…My mum…She sounded like my mum when she spoke so gently. "Edward?"_

"_Mmhm?"_

"_Are you crying, baby?" Her arms instinctively tightened around my shoulders. I could feel her against me so strongly but I couldn't see her or the green of her dress, pressed tight on my face. All I could've seen was glass and blood, warped metal and that bright light; it filled everything – blocked out everything. My mother…she disappeared into the light, her hair was blood, blood was her hair and her shocked eyes never more beautiful than now in that light. It ate her up, gloating as my fingers failed to gain any purchase to tow her back into my existence. My father…he was nothing; there was nothing about him that looked like my father as he sank into oblivion. Mangled was the word – the word I couldn't have fathomed before but now I realized it. My father was mangled._

"_Everyone told me not to tell you but I think I should," she said strongly, nuzzling her cheek into my hair, "I think I should. I love you, Edward. A lot and you need to know that it's okay if you don't love me as well but that doesn't mean that you can't let me in. I want to be a part of your life, if you'll let me. I don't have experience or money or beauty but I do love you."_

_I shook harder yet, sobbing lightly. Maybe a cracked pocket mirror would fool her for now. "I love you too," I croaked out._

_She sighed, kissing my hair. "Now you need to put me down." I clutched her tighter to me. "Yes, you need to put me down and we need to go to your uncle's." That I gave in to. I detangled myself from her and hung my head for I did not want her to see me like this but she had a different agenda. Bella ducked her head to look at me with a pretty smile._

"_You're still cute when you cry." She winked good-naturedly, making me laugh, watery. "With your eyes all bloodshot and poufy, your lashes all wet and matted. Your eyes are even shinier. You look kinda like a sexy Rudolph with your nose all red like that." I rolled my eyes. "And I want to kiss those red, swollen, ducky lips. I love that pout." Bella winked again with a brief snigger. "Can I kiss you?" I nodded, closing my eyes when she pressed her slightly parted lips to mine, my bottom lip fitting snuggly between the gap of aforementioned lips. It was sweet and loving and just what I needed._

"_You talk, I drive?" she suggested hopefully, raising her eyebrows. Like I had said before, undeniable. I passed her the keys._

_She drove fairly well and listened intently as I spilled everything about my parents' death. At traffic light stops, she would hold my hands reassuringly until the light changed. She seemed to sense that I wasn't ready for love, although I had told her that I had loved her as well and so she didn't say that she loved me again._

"_This is the house?" I leaned over her to peer out of the window._

"_Mmhm."_

_Four faces were pressed up against the living room window, anxiously waiting for us. The front door banged open as I helped her from the car and two blond, little peoples ran full tilt towards us, screaming, "Bella!" To say that they hit it off was the understatement of a lifetime. _

"_And what of me?" I interjected dramatically as they jumped around her._

"_What about you?" they asked blankly before resuming their crazy jumping-dance-thingy around my girlfriend._

"_Yeah, Eddies, what about you?" Bella teased sticking her tongue out at me humorously. The lot of them was just too cute for their own good and my past woes had been laid forgotten as they laughed._

"You know," I accused suddenly, "you two loved her like crazy when you met her."

"Well, she destroyed our prototype and –" they started in unison then Rosalie butt in "– it doesn't matter how funny and cool –" then Jasper "– or beautiful and blow-your-mind-or-cock sexy she is –" Finally, they finished, "she isn't nice for what she did."

"You know you still love her and Jasper?"

"Y-yes?"

"Oh, so you're stuttering now, you little bitch. Don't ever speak about my girl like that or I swear I will go apeshit on your ass, plus tell that little Asian bombshell you've got your eyes on exactly what she should know about you." She was Asian, right?

"Please. No!" he begged desperately, "Okay, okay, okay! I won't talk about her like that again!"

"Good." Rosalie was in a fit of hysterics next to him and if I wasn't peeved at the little shit, I would've laughed along with her. "Bye, munchkins."

"Bye, Edward!" I hung up, thinking. Had this been what Bella felt when she thought about me in relation to other women?

"No," I whispered, sitting down on the carpet, massaging my knee, "I'm sure it was much stronger."

Isabella Swan

He was an intelligent man – very, very intelligent – and I had almost forgotten about the tracking device his 'munchkins' had installed in his car about four years back. Well, I had forgotten and Jake had found it when he had been 'flipping' the car, as he called it. 'Stripping' would be more appropriate. I had to constantly remind myself that Jake was not a child anymore and seeing as I had not been around much for more than half of his life, it wasn't fair of me to interrogate him but I did know this much; my kid brother boosted cars and, honestly, that was pretty cool.

"Give me a week and this car will be totally flipped, sis. Dickward wouldn't even recognize it!" he said before moving to take out the seats then he found the tracking device.

"Jake!" I shrieked, "Get that thing out! It's a tracking device!"

Jake, startled by my sudden exclamation, straightened up swiftly, knocking his head soundly on the doorframe. "Fuck!" he screeched.

"Language!"

"Okay then," he said sarcastically, "Foo-kay!"

"Just get that thing out," I grumbled, silently praising any listening deity for Jake's enthusiasm to start as a distraction from my wallowing this self-same night.

"There are buttons!" he said excitedly.

"No shit."

He glared at me over his shoulder, unbolting it with lightning fingers. "It means that I can program it manually."

"As in set a false location?" Now I was curious.

"Mmhm. From the looks of it, it can record the last ten visited locations so you can set up those if you like but we need to turn the remote control function off. Jake yanked out a wire savagely. "There!" I was presented with the strange box-thing by my proud-looking kid brother,

"Okay, here goes nothing." With a large exhaled breath, I started setting the locations, secretly putting my current location with some foreign sense of desperation. "Let's see just how good your memory is, Edward."

When I was finished and the tracker was tucked safely under my right arm, I threw my head back to look at the stars. "Rose, Jazz, forgive me."

_Flashback_

'_**Seventeen…'**_

'_**Innocent…'**_

'_**Mine…'**_

'_**His…'**_

_I felt alight. My blood was boiling for him and my breath came quick and shallow. Edward lips burnt through my dress onto my flesh and his erection, pressed at the apex of my thighs, had me throbbing longingly. But he had stopped and I would respect it. I played with his hair, smoothening out the stubborn tangles at the nape of his neck and teasing his skin._

"_Edward?" I asked cautiously after a while, dying to see his face._

"_Mmhm?" His voice was small, like a little boy's._

"_Can I come down?" I didn't want to be rude and arrive late but he began shaking his head, then his body began shaking, trembling like he was cold – like he was crying. "You're shaking." Panic slid heatedly down my throat. "Edward?" How do I ask him? What if I was wrong?_

"_Mmhm?" His voice sounded thick this time. Maybe I was right…_

"_Are you crying, baby?" My arms tightened around his broad shoulders, hugging him tight to my body, hoping it was enough to make his demons go away._

'_**I love you…' **__I wanted to say it. I had to say it. He needed to know that I was here._

_Mustering up as much courage as I could, I said in a steady voice, "Everyone told me not to tell you but I think I should." Lovingly, I nuzzled my cheek into his soft auburn waves. "I think I should." This was it; my final hurdle. "I love you, Edward. A lot and you need to know that it's okay if you don't love me as well but that doesn't mean that you can't let me in. I want to be a part of your life, if you'll let me. I don't have any experience or money or beauty but I do love you." He shook even harder against me and I could've heard little sobs leaving him. It broke my heart._

"_I love you too," he said huskily. A dominant part of me knew he was lying. Being with Edward for a year had shown me things about him that I never would've guessed before and it broke my heart to hear him lie, even if it was for my benefit._

_I sighed sadly, kissing his hair. __**'I won't say it again.' **__"Now you need to put me down." His arms tightened suddenly around me. "Yes, you need to put me down and we need to go to your uncle's." That seemed to do the trick._

_He stood apart from me with his hung, ashamed, but I wasn't having any of that. I wanted to see him smile but I would be lying if I said I wasn't remotely afraid or that this wasn't hard for me to look at. Edward was a giant, standing tall and proud, beautiful and aloof, on a pedestal with a sunlight halo. I mean, he was no angel but, to me at least, he was damn close. It was hard to see a man who epitomized strength and confidence broken down and on his knees, crying his soul out. I peeked up at him with a small, forced-light-hearted smile and for a while I saw him as a child, not older than me but not younger either; I saw him as a kid my age with his stubble free cheeks and extra tousled hair but, more importantly, with his wide, glassy eyes and 'red-cherry- lips pouted like that._

"_You're still cute when you cry," I teased, winking jokingly, "With your eyes all bloodshot and poufy, your lashes all wet and matted. Your eyes are even shinier. You look kinda like a sexy Rudolph with your nose all red like that." Edward rolled his eyes. __**'Ah…there's my Edward.' **__"And I want to kiss those red, swollen, ducky lips. I love that pout." I winked again, letting a small giggle escape me. "Can I kiss you?"_

_My heart fluttered fickly when he nodded, his lavender lids shutting my gaze out. I reached up on my toes, lips apart a bit to press a chaste kiss to his engorged lips. His bottom lip slid nicely between my lips, sitting there. Edward was weird in a way for his breath was always scorching but now it was cool, like he'd been sucking on ice and I felt mildly discomforted._

_I backed away slowly. "You talk, I drive?" I suggested, needing to know what had caused this…meltdown? With a blank expression, he handed me his keys._

"_My parents…" Edward kept repeating that at first as I drove then he said, "My mum…" I said nothing._

"_Dead." My breathing hitched when he moaned that one word. "Dead…"_

_My mouth remained shut, out of respect or shock, I just didn't know, but, suddenly, he launched out into reminiscence, ranting on about his parents' death when he was a kid, about watching them die and his God-awful nightmares. He said the words 'orphanage' and 'foster homes' but didn't elaborate. I hoped to ask him about it in the near future. At each traffic stop, I would grab his hands and hold them, give him something to hold onto, a branch, so that he wouldn't drown in his memories._

_I pulled up in front of a house that matched the description he gave me. "This is the house?"_

_Edward leaned over me to peer out of the window. I caught his scent of, dominantly, bay leaf, lavender and roses. It was certainly odd for a man to smell so floral but I could smell fresh Earth, heady and rich and it wasn't feminine at all. Edward smelt like a garden in the woods just after it had been rejuvenated. He was pungent with warmth and it comforted me always. His scent was sweet like my mum's Sunday table bouquet, sweet like my dad's spice racks…sweet like home._

"_Mmhm," he murmured, still gazing through the window but his face had brightened up. There were four faces pressed up against the windows, practically bobbing in anticipation. He leaned away, getting out of the car. I noticed that some of his swagger had returned as he walked around the car to help me get out. As I stepped out of the car, the front door banged open and two small, blond children ran madly out of the house, screaming my name._

_They were gorgeous little things! One was a boy and the other, a girl. They were twins; there was no mistaking that, with round, chubby faces that shone like full moons and blue-jewel eyes that glinted like the prettiest of stars. Their golden locks bounced as they danced around me and their infectious laughter got to me. I felt light and free, laughing and spinning with these kids._

_Then Edward butted in with a dramatically amplified indignance. "And what of me?"_

_They stopped and looked at him with blank expressions. "What about you?" Then their dance resumed._

"_Yeah, Eddie, what about you?" I stuck out my tongue at him. He was smiling radiantly at me. How bright I scintillated, drunk in the pleasures of Edward's smile and first love._

_**AN: Please review me.**_


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